Brookhaven Courier

Issue date: 10/22/07 Section: Opinion

Media Credit: Chris Vivero

We live in a society where being single past a certain age is looked down upon. The word single itself scares some women to the point where they are willing to stay in an abusive relationship to avoid being alone for one day.

It's only human and even animal nature to crave a companion in life, but for some the urge isn't as strong.

By the time I was ready to go to prom, I could only name three girls out of my group of friends who were not pregnant or married. At times I envied my friends who were excited to venture into a new chapter of life, responsibility and commitment. I couldn't help but feel left out.

Hanging out with my friends has shown me firsthand how hard their lives are and how strong they have become. They balance jobs and the responsibility of raising the next generation.

Walking the hallways alone in high school became familiar because I was in a relationship that lasted four years and my boyfriend attended a different school. My high school sweetheart had me a phone call away.

I figured it wouldn't be long before I started my own family. Then it hit me, was I only with him for lack of a better companion? Was I scared to be alone?

I considered myself an independent woman, yet there I was in a pattern that was all too familiar.

I realized I was blinded by my surroundings and infatuated with the thought of love.

I didn't need the same life I had seen my friends play out. I had a choice, but I was scared to make it.

Life had brought me to a turning point.

I was only hurting myself by staying with him. It was the hardest thing I've ever done, but I got out of the relationship. Now, I live a life that offers independence and opportunity.

I don't know many women who would go to a bar or club alone and have the courage to talk to random people, but I do it all the time. I don't know many women who have sat alone in a movie theater content with a bag of popcorn, but I have.

I've grown content with living single, but that's not to say I don't date. I like to keep my options open, and if that's a crime, put me away for life. I can see myself downtown in a big city somewhere at age 35 still working on my career.

I can pick up my things any day and just leave, travel and live in a different city.

The world is a big place and I want to experience everything it has to offer.

I'm not totally cynical about love; I do hope to marry someday and even have some of my own snot faces, but that can wait. When it's all said and done I want to say I lived life to the fullest and never let anyone pull me down.

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